Emotionally secure people display certain character traits that set them apart from the rest of the population. A Harvard-trained psychologist determined nine questions that would help a person figure out if they’re emotionally secure or not. How would you like to find out your level of emotional security? Let’s look at the questions.
Defining Emotional Stability
Emotional security or emotional stability is a measure of your emotional state at any given point. Certain things can make people change their emotional states without warning and can lead to feelings of rage or sadness.
An emotionally stable person is able to understand themselves and the situation they’re in and figure out the best responses. These questions were designed to test if someone is emotionally stable, and answering them will help you understand your level of stability.
Can Someone Present a Different Perspective Without You Getting Angry?
Emotionally secure people have very balanced tempers. Discussions with them rarely devolve into arguments, even if they disagree with what the other person says about a topic. They know what they believe about something and have the right words to explain their position.
Instead of quickly devolving into a battle of words and wits, it’s rather a common ground discussion with the emotionally secure person understanding the other person’s perspective. Even during times of disagreement, they keep this approach.
Can You Put Healthy Boundaries in Place?
If you’re emotionally secure, you know yourself well, and you know what your limits are when it comes to thoughts and actions. These limits are based on your core values and how you see yourself. Asking yourself what you believe in can help you ascertain your boundaries.
Emotionally secure people can tell you how they feel, and if they’re mistreated, they can explain how they would prefer to be treated. If these boundaries are ignored, they will respond firmly but without malice.
Can You Admit That You Might Be Wrong?
It’s a trope that many people in the world have difficulty admitting they’re wrong about something. However, acknowledging that you’re wrong is the sign of an emotionally secure person.
Many people think that admitting you’re wrong is a failure on your part. It’s more of a societal value than anything else, and learning how to deal with this healthily is crucial to your emotional development.
What Are Your Core Values and Beliefs?
What do you value above everything else, and what sort of beliefs do you hold? Generally, many people take it for granted that everyone else thinks like they do or has the same things as sacred.
Knowing your core beliefs and values makes you into a more consistent individual in all walks of life. Emotional security is associated with being authentic, which stems from fundamentally knowing who you are.
Can You Express Your Negative Emotions Healthily?
Communication encompasses emotions. It’s not uncommon for someone to feel passionate about something and drive that passion into their words. However, communicating your feelings respectfully matters to the other person.
Letting someone else know how you’re feeling in a healthy way allows them to accept what you’re saying and understand your feelings. It would be best if you didn’t make another person feel lesser because you don’t feel happy.
Can You Accept Criticism From Other People?
Constructive feedback is meant to help you grow and become a better person. However, you must learn to accept criticism gracefully, or you will never grow emotionally. Fighting back against constructive criticism ensures mediocrity.
Criticism can impact how you see yourself if you don’t have a solid emotional foundation. Constructive criticism won’t make you feel bad if you are sure about yourself. You’ll see it as a way to improve and get better at what you do.
Are You Always Striving to Grow and Change?
People should always aim to be a better version of themselves today than they were yesterday. For that to happen, we have to grow and evolve. Change happens as we learn about the world around us and our place in it. We must be open to change to become the best version of ourselves.
If you are always trying to improve yourself and grow as a person, you show that you’re emotionally secure. Emotionally secure people are not afraid to embrace change and have a plan for improving themselves over their lifetime.
Can You Avoid Impulsive Reaction?
Difficult situations happen to all of us, and emotions can run high. Impulsive reactions occur when a person just does whatever they immediately feel like doing without thinking about consequences or the feelings of those around them.
Impulsive reactions like these are a sign of emotional instability. Emotionally stable people can think through their reactions and respond logically, even in the most emotionally charged situations. That allows them to have a more measured response as opposed to an impulsive one.
Do You Trust That You’ll Be Okay Regardless of Challenges?
When you think about the hardship you’re facing, are you sure that you’ll be okay? Emotionally insecure people spend a lot of their time worrying about what’s going to happen and are in a constant state of anxiety.
Emotionally stable people know themselves and trust in their ability to overcome all the challenges thrown their way. They also understand the importance of gratitude to those who helped them through their trials.
How Did You Do?
How many of these questions did you answer “yes” to? Responding yes to a few of these shows that you have some level of emotional security, but there are a few places you could improve on for better communication with others.
Emotional stability helps us to live better lives by avoiding getting into problems with other people. It also allows us to understand ourselves and how we fit into the world around us. Being emotionally stable can help us grow and develop into better human beings while respecting others we may come across. It’s a worthy goal to aim for.
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